Dark Side of Psychiatric Drugs

While staying at "24" Jason began to experience high anxiety attacks and a lot more stress. The environment there was not a fit for Jason and resulted in some very unhealthy experiences for him. One day, he decided to buy a bus ticket to Calgary to stay with Grandma and Grandpa for awhile. He wanted to get away from his world as the pain he was experiencing seemed so unbearable for him. While waiting for the bus, he called home and told Bev of his intentions. I met with Jason and we called Grandpa to talk it over. He agreed to stay and continue with his psychiatric treatment at "24".

Jason was learning some destructive behaviors in his new home and the practice of these behaviors got more dangerous. His roommate hid some pot in their room and began sharing it with Jason. Another patient at the home showed Jason how "high" he could get by drinking cough syrup. He also experimented with cutting (self-injury), a way to transfer emotional pain to physical pain. On one occasion, he required medical attention at the hospital.

Jason was taking his medication on a consistent basis and it was given to him under supervision by the staff at "24". Because Jason wasn't doing well, his psychiatrist would adjust the dosage or introduce new medication. We kept hearing that this was very common for people suffering from mental illness. But Jason kept getting sicker with higher anxiety attacks, less controllable suicide thoughts, more confusion and deeper emotional pain. He started believing that he would always be on anti-depressants as he couldn't imagine life without being medicated. Jason had very little hope for the future and believing that he had no reasons to live became a moment by moment battle.

Several months later, in November of 2007, he began planning for a suicide attempt. He smoked some pot, drank a bottle of cough syrup, bought some off the counter sleeping pills and stole a small knife from the kitchen at "24". He called us from an isolated area at a local park to tell us that he stabbed himself in the chest. Jason was scared and could hardly stay awake. When we got there, I saw blood on his sweatshirt and the knife on the ground with blood on it. I wrapped my arms around him and told him I loved him and that he would be moving back home. This was the 2nd time in the past couple months that he broke down sobbing while I embraced him and these embraces will likely be a memory that will always stick with me. The RCMP were there to investigate and the ambulance took him to the hospital. Jason had written a suicide note in his journal which was left with us. We brought it home and I read the whole journal and cried all night. His emotional pain was written throughout the journal from the time he was 1st admitted to the psych ward and the depth of his pain was shocking. I would not let Bev read it before returning it to Jason. After being treated for his chest wound and drug intake, he was transferred back to the psych ward for a few days, then back to "24". Jason refused to move back home and decided to go back to "24" but guard himself from other people. He wanted to get well and learned that these places are not social opportunities, but recovery centers.

In February of 2008, Jason decided to get his own apartment. This gave him independence and I was pleased to see that he was being responsible. In a month or so, he was in trouble again and ended up in the psychiatric ward. He was drinking and smoking pot while taking his medication and wanted to swallow a bunch of sleeping pills, which he had saved up. The temptation to do it scared him and he had the sense to call the emergency response line for help. The RCMP arrived at his apartment, handcuffed him, and took him to the psych ward on a mandatory commitment under the Mental Health Laws. He was released a couple days later and we arranged for him to see a psychologist, who specialized with borderline personality disorder. After several months, we found this therapy was ineffective, mostly due to the prescribed medication being taken at the same time.

After living on his own for a couple months, Jason decided to move back home, but his condition did not improve. There appeared to be times when there were improvements but they were either short term or he was concealing his pain from us. Obsessive suicidal thoughts were with him constantly and he was feeling more depressed than ever. He slept a lot and feelings of being emotionally and mentally paralyzed stopped him from doing anything productive.

These dark days were a struggle for all of us. We could only hope that we would find some answers before he killed himself. And, there was nothing we could do except hang on to the only thing we seemed to be able to believe .... that God loves all of us as a loving Father, and that included Jason. But, we still didn't know how that would play out for our family in the here and now.

The Unknown World of Mental Illness

The following day, I visited Jason and I noticed he was not himself. He seemed withdrawn and responded with a lot less emotion. I learned that he was prescribed additional medication because of the "voices" he was hearing in his head. Each day, I saw him getting more withdrawn, less emotional and more suicidal. I started to believe that Jason was a lot sicker than I originally thought as he was spiraling downwards very fast. We were losing him and the journey was to be a very dangerous, destructive, and almost fatal one.

Bev and I didn't know what to do except trust in the psychiatrist and others who were trying to help Jason. The doctors believed that he was mentally ill and that the prescribed drugs would eventually turn things around for him. Jason was diagnosed as having "major depression and borderline personality disorder". He kept getting sicker as time passed but we were told that the drugs can take up to 6 weeks before kicking in. When the dosage would change or when new medication was introduced, the waiting would extend further. The psychiatrist didn't know Jason prior to admitting him to the psych ward. The privacy laws do not permit open communication between the psychiatrist and the family, especially when the patient is legally considered an adult.

Our faith began to grow a lot more simply and it narrowed to one thing... that God loves all of us and, in the bigger picture, it will all be good. This didn't mean that we believed God would heal Jason because we honestly didn't know what would happen, he doesn't heal everybody that needs healing. But, in the darkest moments of this journey, we hung on to this one and only belief, that our heavenly Father loves us and knows what's best for our family, whatever that looked like. I once thought that when people had faith like this that it meant they were pretty spiritual. Now, I know differently. There is no way we were able to make ourselves believe that "all would be good in God's way". Faith is a gift that we found within us and we thank God for it. This didn't mean we felt confident and at peace that all would be heavenly, some days we felt stretched more than we can handle. But, hanging on to a measure of faith in this one thing gave us what we needed one day at a time which made the journey more bearable.

After about a week in the psychiatric ward, he was transferred to a transitional home where men and women share meals and cleaning duties together. We were told that he would be staying there for about 3 months before returning home. A week later, he experienced an emotional setback and was taken back to the psych ward for a few more days. From there, they moved him to 24th Avenue, another transitional home with staff support around the clock. This proved to be disastrous for Jason as he quickly developed male and female relationships who resided there with him. These relationships were unhealthy ones as everybody was struggling with their various issues. Jason was hurt by some failed relationships and learned some very destructive behaviors while staying at "24".

Another important lesson learned was to push harder to meet with the psychiatrist so that he can know and better understand Jason. Meetings with the psychiatrist should also be permitted to monitor the reaction to the medication being prescribed. If there is little or no cooperation, the request should be taken to higher authorities and if necessary, a formal complaint should be registered with provincial bodies such as the College of Physicians, Mental Health review panels, and the Canadian Mental Health Association. Unfortunately, like us, most people are not aware of the options available to them. Maybe with more awareness, the quality of mental health rehabilitation will improve. Next week, we will be sharing some of the darker experiences of this journey, further emphasizing the dangers of psychiatric drugs. For shocking information about the psychiatric industry, check out this video and the related ones at the following link: http://video.google.ca/videoplay?docid=8652960977963341187

If you know anybody that might be helped by this information, please do not hesitate to forward this blog to them. Also, please feel free to add comments about your take on the psychiatric world.

Going In ... Easier Than Coming Out !

Jason still regrets leaving his job with Safeway. He worked there for 4 years and Randy, the manager told me that Jason was a hard worker and had a good attitude. Since leaving Safeway, he worked for 2 other grocery chains and experienced a deflating incident with a 3rd employer. Jason was offered a full time job with Canadian Tire, then on his 1st day on the job he was told that they made a mistake and were not able to keep him. This took place after he resigned from his former employer, now leaving him without a job. I met with the owner who admitted they made a mistake and gave Jason a couple weeks pay and a letter of apology. This helped a bit but he was crushed, especially after bouncing around a couple jobs already.

Jason told us he felt depressed and had little motivation. The setbacks with jobs, some lost relationships, and a couple of disappointments in not achieving other goals were some of the challenges he was facing. Our family doctor prescribed him with a low dosage of anti-depressants, but we didn't see any change in Jason. In fact, it was only a few weeks later when he told a friend that he wanted to commit suicide. His friend, concerned of what might happen, picked him up and drove him to the hospital. That's when Bev and I heard about it so we rushed over to the hospital to be with Jason. I'll never forget what Jason said to me while we waited for the psychiatrist to talk to him. He told me he wasn't sure why he was there, like this was an over-reaction. But, we assured him that it would be best to talk to the psychiatrist to be safe.

Finally, the psychiatrist arrived and took Jason to a private room. We were not permitted to be with him as Jason was 21 yrs old and it is the hospital's policy to respect the privacy of it's patients. Following his meeting, the psychiatrist informed us that they decided to admit Jason to the psych ward for further observations. Bev and I went home that evening a bit shaken but I felt sure we would be picking him up by noon the next day and he would be back to work in a couple days. This was on July 31st, 2007, the beginning of a hellish experience for Jason that lasted for 2 years.

We have since learned that it wasn't Jason's depression and suicide thoughts that landed him in the psychiatric ward. It was the mild dosage of anti-depressants which were prescribed only a few weeks prior to Jason being admitted by the psychiatrist. Looking back, and we have done a lot of "looking back" on this experience, some therapy for Jason to talk about the things that were bringing him down would have helped him come out of the state of mind he was in. Not drugs. Good counselling without a mind clouded by medication would have been the pill to take.

If I could go back and change only 1 thing, it would have been to arrange some professional therapy and keep him "the hell" out of the psychiatric ward. Being admitted to a psychiatric ward is really an easy thing to do, getting out is another matter! More to be shared in a few days. Please stay tuned and thank you for listening.

Legal Psychiatric Drugs - A Lethal Weapon

Hi, my name is Dan. I started this blog today to share a story about how psychiatric drugs almost killed my son, Jason. Why share this? Because I learned through this experience that most people rely on the medical professionals to decide what's best for them and in fact, these professionals don't have a clue! With Jason's permission, I want to tell our story to raise the awareness level for anybody touched by depression and other mental illnesses.

It doesn't seem to matter who you talk to these days, everybody knows of someone prescribed to anti-depressants. An alarming 10% of the US population is prescribed anti-depressants in a given year, according to an article at the following link: http://www.webmd.com/depression/news/20090803/antidepressant-use-nearly-doubles. The article goes on to say that these prescriptions have almost doubled since last year!

Do you really believe that the need to medicate ourselves for depression has actually doubled in a year? Do you think the increase in advertising of these products in the past few years has conditioned many of us to accepting these drugs as a common solution? Not!

Please don't get me wrong on this subject. Psychiatric drugs of all kinds have been around for many years and have helped a lot of people who had few options. I know people who have been saved of unimaginable problems with the help of their family doctors and/or psychiatrists. However, I believe these drugs are wrongly prescribed to the majority of those taking them.

My son, Jason was a teenager growing into a young adult with the problems and challenges experienced in this phase of life. He was prescribed with a mild dosage of anti-depressants by our family doctor and this was the start of a 2 year hell for Jason and his family. Our story will be shared as time permits. Stay tuned!